Would it be possible to leave two computers both permanently synced in Send & Receive mode, but with one computer always automatically given priority in the event of a file conflict?
Can you describe in more detail what exactly are you trying to solve
Sure.
When I am at home, I listen to music on my iTunes server. I also make deliberate changes to my playlists there that I want automatically copied back to my laptop.
When I am on the train to work, I listen to music on my laptop. I also make deliberate changes to my playlists there that I want automatically copied back to my iTunes server.
If my family also listens to music while I am out, there will be incidental changes to the iTunes Server (play counts etc) that I am happy to overwrite while merging back my deliberate changes.
I think you should set the folder as receive only on your family computers?